A Challenge to David Avocado Wolfe: Take a Flying Leap (literally).

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David Avocado Wolfe is an asshole.

(Hi guys, I missed you too!)

He’s the guy who spent a lifetime telling you about all the superfoods you need for longevity and now sells a fancy blender that allegedly turns every food into a superfood. Funny how commissions a fancy blender can do that! His claims, pieced together in this wonderfully composed video, include that chocolate is an octave of sun energy, mushrooms are extraterrestrial, and… gravity ain’t no thang.

Wait, what?

Let’s have a chit chat about this. Because we all know you can say any shit that comes to mind on the internet, but you can’t get away with it forever without somebody catching you. I’m going to hold Wolfe to this one. 

Wolfe’s statement, starting at the 1:35 mark:

Gravity is not intrinsic to matter. That Carl Sagan idea that was sold to us on Cosmos on PBS, was sold to us deliberately to actually confuse us just so you know that. There’s people who have known that gravity is a force that can be displaced. There’s people that have known that since the 50s or even earlier than that. But by screwing up, confusing our mind about things, and giving us incorrect theories we were brain washed into a totally different belief system. That gravity is intrinsic to all matter, we’re fighting gravity, we have to push our way through gravity to launch a craft up into outer space, all this nonsense. 

You should probably check out the whole video (it’s less than ten minutes and it’s pretty damning). But for now, as we’re a science page, here’s the challenge.

Prove, in a controlled setting, that you can defy gravityPreferably via getting a craft into outer space, but I’ll take levitation in a controlled setting in front of a group of professional scientists and skeptics. 

You’re telling people that gravity is just confusing our minds and it’s bullshit, you’ve successfully horked down enough goji berries, mushrooms and chocolate to free your mind over your career as hippie-cum-guru, go ahead. Prove once and for all that you can free your mind of fact and science right into outer space. 

I’ll be waiting. But I won’t be holding my breath. Because I live in a land of facts, where we need oxygen, mushrooms are just a fungus, chocolate is a dessert from this planet, super foods are bullshit, and gravity is going to glue your hippie sandals firmly to the ground no matter if you believe in it or not. 

-SciBabe.

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60 Comments

  1. Thanks for attacking this guy’s rhetoric. He’s said all sorts of assholish things over the years, pretending like he’s some South Asian guru (that can’t speak Hindi aside from yoga class poorly pronounced words). What a prick. Thanks again!

  2. Whoa. He actually manages to get through his days? Are there people who listen to him who haven’t taken way too much of the brown acid?

    Totally want to see some yogic flying.

  3. I survived the end of the world yesterday, so I must be immortal. Maybe I’m not susceptible to gravity either.

    Let’s see.
    Up, Up and Awaaaaagghh…
    Ow!

    So, nope.

    But I am wearing a Catholic Schoolgirl skirt.

  4. So Big Skateboard has been holding out on us, eh? All this time they could actually make a real hoverboard, but didn’t want to reveal gravity ain’to nothing. Bastards!

  5. F[g] = (m1*m2*G)/d^2

    Newton, et. al.

    This Wolfe guy is an ignoramus of outrageous proportions. He can’t even make good conspiracy theories. You’re supposed to only stick with areas that *aren’t* well known.


    Furry cows moo and decompress.

    • Well, levitation has been done.
      With a small frog, with *really* powerful magnets, which suspended the frog against the attraction of gravity.
      Frankly, I think it was a dreadful waste of electricity, but really, really cool. 😉

  6. Besides the trained observers, there should be cameras at the demonstration, located so that they record the event from all directions, including from above. Also, infra-red or other light-based measuring systems should be focused on the experimental subject with appropriate recording devices attached and opperational. Nothing like a photograph to prove something really happened. And time/distance/angle of deflection, etc. information is good too.

  7. Yeah sounds like he’s not firing on all cylinders. And it’s good to make people aware that he shouldn’t be regarded as some nutritional guru. However, I didn’t appreciate how the video used a tragic and undoubtedly traumatic incident from his family’s past as a weapon. The goofy music continues the whole time it talks about his father shooting and killing his step-mom! Classy. I also don’t think the wrongdoings of his father and brother are relevant to his character.
    So I agree people should know not to listen to his advice, but, damn. I hate when people who are right are so wrong in the way they present it. It’s like people write their argument, tape it to a rock, and throw it at the other guy’s head these days.

  8. Leave it to a guy named “Avocado” to have a head filled with mushy stuff, at the center of which is an incredibly dense knot of uselessness…

  9. Thanks to Wolfe we now know there is no such thing as gravity and mushrooms grow on the Sun. My life is now complete with the sacred knowledge he has given us…. 😉

    (…that was sarcasm…)

  10. If not for Wolfe’s record of outrageous past behavior I’d have been prepared to pass off the video as some sort of ill-conceived performance art.

  11. It’s really not fair to taint something as lovely as an avocado by putting it in his name. I’m feeling sincerely vexed for the avocados of the world right now.

  12. Guys like David Wolfe are con artists. They have that disarming and easy charm that makes them easy to listen to. However Wolfe specifically likes to appropriate Good Feeling quotes. And one liners that are designed to make us feel good and Uses them on social media. I’m sure we’ve all seen them floating around. In and of themselves those memes are Fine. In fact they are Good for you, however he uses the Social Currency those Guru style messages give him. That currency gives him Opportunity to talk and for others to listen. He makes his money selling bullshit. Plane and simple. All so that he doesn’t Have to get a Real Job. He can say pretty much what he wants as long as the larger venues don’t bring out more Outlandish baloney. Cuz if This is the Norm for him,then his fifteen minutes are due to expire soon. He’ll trip himself up, kinda like Trump is doing right now, guys his own worst enemy.

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  14. Listening to this guy talk, and comparing it to a lot of the people I met at Rainbow Gatherings and while living on the street, I have to wonder…IS David Avocado Wolfe really a scam artist, or is he just a burned out weirdo with mental problems that someone else directed towards profitability for their gain? Is his agent a relative?

  15. re “is D Avocado” a scam artist or just a burned out weirdo:

    Pretty sure answer is “scam artist”. He’s just doing so good a job at appearing to be a burned out weirdo, he’s got you beat.

    But, in the end, the more important point is: It doesn’t matter if he believes his crap or not. His crappy ideas are hurting people. That means he’s dangerous regardless of his motives.


    Furry cows moo and decompress.

  16. When someone is way ahead of his time, of course he is perceived as a con-artist or weirdo by the brainwashed crowd.
    Go David, You Brave Soul!

  17. SUPER FOODS ARE FIGHTING CANCER AND OTHER ILLNESSES. DAVID IS NOT MY GURU AND I DO MY OWN RESEARCH. HE IS NOT DANGEROUS TO ME OR ANYBODY THAT IS AN INTELLIGENT HUMAN BEING. I ACTUALLY AGREE WITH RAVEN STARRE.

  18. This reminds me of http://saltydroid.info where the Salty Droid says that scammers are scammers and then the scammers come around and they say:

    “I hav big business! My monies are so awesome!! U R just jealous!!!”

    Of course it is easy for someone to make a *claim* of wealth. It doesn’t really prove anything.

    And you just randomly claiming to Sci Babe: “My businesses are more successful then [sic] yours will ever be.” is entirely unconvincing.

    It is important for you to keep making [likely false] claims of great income and wealth because your real business is trying to trick people into believing that you have a real business.

    Or at least–that is my current opinion.

    I will let you have the last flame-y, angry, probably not-logical word on the subject, if you want, “Raven Starre”.


    Furry cows moo and decompress.

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